I never thought that I would be in a position where I could share my views on anything military related but in life you just never know. I recently had the opportunity to get to know someone in the military and also had friends who were married to service members. Based on my experience and also knowing about other people’s situations, I wanted to share my point of view and a few things that I think everyone should consider before dating anyone in the military.
1) Dating someone in the military is not for everyone. I know people who have tried it, and unfortunately, some didn’t work out. In my opinion, an open and honest communication is crucial because you have to understand what you are getting yourself into and be able to discuss how you two will make it work as a pair. A relationship with someone in the military is not easy and might be one of your most complicated relationships. Therefore, unless you sincerely care and love that person, there’s a huge possibility that it will not work out. You have to be in it for the right reasons because you will be tested. Only God, genuine love, and determination will keep you together.
2) You have to be strong, patient, understanding, and supportive. Sometimes we can’t help but worry about the people that we care about, and the military doesn’t make it any easier. Life in the military can be dangerous and hectic, and worrying too much will only add more anxiety to your life and your partner’s, which is not fair to them. The future is uncertain because your partner can be deployed anytime and there’s nothing you can do about it. You’ll spend a lot of time apart, and that include holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, and special celebrations. You have to be able to understand that it’s part of their job and have no choice but to accept it and support them. You have to be open to the possibility of moving a lot if you two end up getting married because they can be stationed almost anywhere.
3) A lot of people who join the military like it as a career. You have to be willing to embrace their lifestyle and be part of the military family. You can’t expect them to leave and do something else if that’s what they are passionate about. That’s why it’s important to talk, get answers to any questions, or address any concerns when you’re talking to someone in the military. The last thing you want is choosing to date anyone for that matter and having issues down the line because you never discuss the future and what is expected from each other.
3) Friends and family members might have a hard time understanding why would you consider being in a relationship with someone in the military. You probably won’t get as much support as you would like because they might not take it seriously or don’t think it’ll last. Some may believe that you’re crazy for signing up for something like that. You can’t really blame them because many civilians don’t have much knowledge about the military. You’ll find yourself being very protective or defensive whenever someone makes an ignorant comment about the military. You’ll also be much more interested in anything military related and want to educate yourself more about the military every chance you get.
4) You have to be ready for the emotional rollercoaster. You’ll find yourself missing someone so much that it hurts. You have to be able to trust them, and they have to trust you as well. You’ll have plenty of lonely nights and might not be able to talk to your partner when you want them the most. You have to understand that life in the military can be stressful and at times your service member might be grouchy, and it might blow back on you. When that happens, you have to try not to take things personally, and sometimes you may even need to give them some space. It might get frustrated, but it helps to stay positive.
5) I’ve always admired and have so much respect for service members. Besides the fact that I think a man in uniform is totally attractive..Lol I also believe that they are well-rounded, strong, and brave individuals. If you meet someone in the military that you like and can handle their lifestyle, I think a relationship with them is entirely worth it. Like I already stated, communication will be very important because that’s all you’ll have to rely on majority of the time. If you stick with it, you may get to experience true love, and that is to love someone through thick and thin. You’ll get to appreciate every second spend together, and cherish the beautiful memories you’ll create as a couple.
6) Last but not least, pray about it! As a Christian, I strongly believe that a relationship works best when God is in the center. You have to pray for each other, trust in one another and God’s plan. When two people care for each other, they always find a way to make it work no matter how hard it gets. Love isn’t supposed to be easy; it’s supposed to be worth it!
Until next time,